I smile because I am your friend!
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.
-- An Original Plagiarism By Father Time --
Friday, June 30, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Time To Lay It On The Line
My New Living Will Form
I, Father Time being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass a ninth-grade civics test if their lives depended on it or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up their bills.
If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:
it should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.
At this point, it's time to call the New Orleans Preservation Hall Jazz Band to come do their thing at my wake, and ask all of my friends to raise their wine/beer glasses to toast the good times we have had.
Signature: Father Time
Date: June 28, 2006
NOTE: I also hear in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier and have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes. (Fly: Can you confirm this?)
I, Father Time being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass a ninth-grade civics test if their lives depended on it or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up their bills.
If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:
- ______a Glass of Spring Hill Cellars 2003 Pinot Noir
______a Margarita
______a Double single-malt scotch on the rocks
______a Pint of Guinness
______a Glass of any Chardonnay
______a New York Steak
______Lobster or crab legs
______The remote control
______a Glass of milk and two Oreos
______The sports page
______Chocolate
______Sex,
it should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.
At this point, it's time to call the New Orleans Preservation Hall Jazz Band to come do their thing at my wake, and ask all of my friends to raise their wine/beer glasses to toast the good times we have had.
Signature: Father Time
Date: June 28, 2006
NOTE: I also hear in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier and have a lot more visitors. Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes. (Fly: Can you confirm this?)
Monday, June 26, 2006
24 Hours On A Quarter Mile Track
Last Friday, I volunteered to participate in my first American Cancer Society Relay For Life.
The format is familiar - teams made up of volunteers who take turns walking (or running) around a quarter-mile track for specified periods of time. Each lap is worth a predetermined amount of money donated by sponsors.
No big deal, right? Well, there was a catch. The event took place from 12:00PM on Friday until 12:00PM Saturday, and someone from each team had to be on the track at all times. The location was our local high school football/track facility. Each team was assigned a location on the infield to pitch tents or cots, tables, camping gear, etc. And yes, it was a true relay event with a baton that had to be handed off to a teammate when your "shift" ended. All in all, it should have been a lot of fun.
For the most part it was. However, there was one aspect that almost pushed me over the edge. About 8:00PM on Friday night, a couple of DJ's arrived with a monster sound system. Their goal - to serenade and/or motivate us during the wee hours of the morning. On paper, a great idea! In execution, a disaster, at least for our team. The well-meaning DJ's proceeded to place a huge JBL speaker no more than 25 feet from our campsite! So friends, I listened to 70's rock at about 100 dbs, ALL NIGHT LONG!
My assigned sleeping hours were from 12:00AM midnight until 5:30AM with my next shift starting at 6:00AM. Did I sleep? As unbelievable as it sounds, I actually fell asleep, or at least dozed, until 3:00AM when they played a POLKA! I bolted upright on my cot, every hair standing on end, thinking I had OD'd on polysorbates. Only the quick thinking of one of my teammates stopped me from calling 911 and announcing the arrival of alien beings.
Eventually, I started to doze off again when they played King Tut by Steve Martin. Try dozing and laughing at the same time. So I made a command decision - brew some coffee and get on with my day at 3:30AM. Out came my camp stove, my carefully measured ground coffee, my coffee pot, and eight cups of water. Just as I was digging around in my pack for matches, another disaster struck - I had forgotten to bring a coffee cup! Dumb, dumb, dumb!
Enough for now. Writing this was supposed to be therapy. Instead it's taking me down the ugly road to low self esteem. In the words of Western Union - STOP.
Good news - we raised a bunch of money for cancer research. Even better news - I slept for 10 uninterrupted hours last night.
The format is familiar - teams made up of volunteers who take turns walking (or running) around a quarter-mile track for specified periods of time. Each lap is worth a predetermined amount of money donated by sponsors.
No big deal, right? Well, there was a catch. The event took place from 12:00PM on Friday until 12:00PM Saturday, and someone from each team had to be on the track at all times. The location was our local high school football/track facility. Each team was assigned a location on the infield to pitch tents or cots, tables, camping gear, etc. And yes, it was a true relay event with a baton that had to be handed off to a teammate when your "shift" ended. All in all, it should have been a lot of fun.
For the most part it was. However, there was one aspect that almost pushed me over the edge. About 8:00PM on Friday night, a couple of DJ's arrived with a monster sound system. Their goal - to serenade and/or motivate us during the wee hours of the morning. On paper, a great idea! In execution, a disaster, at least for our team. The well-meaning DJ's proceeded to place a huge JBL speaker no more than 25 feet from our campsite! So friends, I listened to 70's rock at about 100 dbs, ALL NIGHT LONG!
My assigned sleeping hours were from 12:00AM midnight until 5:30AM with my next shift starting at 6:00AM. Did I sleep? As unbelievable as it sounds, I actually fell asleep, or at least dozed, until 3:00AM when they played a POLKA! I bolted upright on my cot, every hair standing on end, thinking I had OD'd on polysorbates. Only the quick thinking of one of my teammates stopped me from calling 911 and announcing the arrival of alien beings.
Eventually, I started to doze off again when they played King Tut by Steve Martin. Try dozing and laughing at the same time. So I made a command decision - brew some coffee and get on with my day at 3:30AM. Out came my camp stove, my carefully measured ground coffee, my coffee pot, and eight cups of water. Just as I was digging around in my pack for matches, another disaster struck - I had forgotten to bring a coffee cup! Dumb, dumb, dumb!
Enough for now. Writing this was supposed to be therapy. Instead it's taking me down the ugly road to low self esteem. In the words of Western Union - STOP.
Good news - we raised a bunch of money for cancer research. Even better news - I slept for 10 uninterrupted hours last night.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
More Peugeot Concept Car
In an earlier post here, I had a picture of a radical concept car from Peugeot. Thanks to CarScoop's Blog I was able to get some answers to several questions. Here's what they had to say about it:
The Moovie was created by a Portuguese designer, Andre Costa, and was voted as the best project among 3,800 entries. The main reasons for the award were the original style, expressing a clear allegiance with the Marque, and its many innovations which make it a genuine future prospect.
The Peugeot likeness is shown subtly, since Costa cleverly used the U, which usually frames the lion on the front of the Marques models. This presentation is even more astute, since here the U structures the passenger compartment, connecting the generous front windscreen to the rear windscreen in a single line.
The vehicle also features numerous innovations. Its doors, which house the rear wheels, have a dual function.The first allows easy access to the passenger compartment, thanks to two swivel doors.The second reduces the energy consumption required to drive the Moovie, thanks to its large wheel dimensions. In addition, the Moovie is exceptionally agile under all circumstances and can be driven easily in restricted spaces thanks to the two spheres located at the front.
The Making Of The Prototype
The Moovie was built under the supervision of the Peugeot Style Centre, according to criteria normally used for the construction of vehicles intended for a Motor Show. Three months work was required, from the digitization phase to the final model exhibited at the Frankfurt Motor Show.
In the absence of three-dimensional drawings, it was necessary to give proportions to this project, for the exterior and interior, that conformed to the general idea mooted by Ande Costa.
Digitization of the vehicle as a whole and its component parts made it possible to obtain a precise 3D image of the Moovie. This phase was essential, making it possible to determine the car's reference data - length, width and height, as well as its architecture. Using this data, a 1/5 scale reference model was produced, giving body to this virtual reality.
Once the model was approved, prototype production could begin.
Production starts with the machining of a scale 1 model.This high-density foam model is produced on the basis of digital specifications. Its purpose is to give substance to the volumes and allow necessary adjustments to curves and radii, to give the body a curvier finish.
The physical medium allows the production of resin moulds.The six moulds needed to produce the body are then assembled and lined with epoxy resin. Used in the mass production of cars, this 3mm thick resin has mechanical properties guaranteeing excellent rigidity.
At the same time, parts such as the headlights, seats and fascia panel are also moulded.
The sidelights and headlamps use polycarbonate, while the casing relies on the technique of nylon sintering.The colour of the parts is obtained by plexiglass cut from a solid block.
The seats consist of two epoxy half-shells assembled on a steel chassis. The fascia panel is made of high-density foam, milled from a solid block.
The different body parts are then assembled. This stage is the longest, since it necessitates a high level of precision: parts are lightly reworked, certain assembly procedures are modified.
The generous glazed surface area of the Moovie is made of polycarbonate. Before being installed on the body, this thermoformed part is adjusted with meticulous attention to detail.
The paint is applied in two stages. A polyurethane primer thinned with water is applied first, allowing final corrections to be made to the body.Three different paint pigments are then applied, the final aspect being given by the varnish: brilliant for the body, soft for the interior.
The Moovie can now receive the Marque badge. The lion is made in stereo before being chromeplated.
Technical Specifications
Length: 2.33 m
Width: 1.80 m
Height: 1.54 m
Estimated weight: 500 kg
LED lighting
Conclusions
Fascinating! Father Time plans on being around for another couple of decades to see some of this futuristic stuff come to life. Oh ya!
The Moovie was created by a Portuguese designer, Andre Costa, and was voted as the best project among 3,800 entries. The main reasons for the award were the original style, expressing a clear allegiance with the Marque, and its many innovations which make it a genuine future prospect.
The Peugeot likeness is shown subtly, since Costa cleverly used the U, which usually frames the lion on the front of the Marques models. This presentation is even more astute, since here the U structures the passenger compartment, connecting the generous front windscreen to the rear windscreen in a single line.
The vehicle also features numerous innovations. Its doors, which house the rear wheels, have a dual function.The first allows easy access to the passenger compartment, thanks to two swivel doors.The second reduces the energy consumption required to drive the Moovie, thanks to its large wheel dimensions. In addition, the Moovie is exceptionally agile under all circumstances and can be driven easily in restricted spaces thanks to the two spheres located at the front.
The Making Of The Prototype
The Moovie was built under the supervision of the Peugeot Style Centre, according to criteria normally used for the construction of vehicles intended for a Motor Show. Three months work was required, from the digitization phase to the final model exhibited at the Frankfurt Motor Show.
In the absence of three-dimensional drawings, it was necessary to give proportions to this project, for the exterior and interior, that conformed to the general idea mooted by Ande Costa.
Digitization of the vehicle as a whole and its component parts made it possible to obtain a precise 3D image of the Moovie. This phase was essential, making it possible to determine the car's reference data - length, width and height, as well as its architecture. Using this data, a 1/5 scale reference model was produced, giving body to this virtual reality.
Once the model was approved, prototype production could begin.
Production starts with the machining of a scale 1 model.This high-density foam model is produced on the basis of digital specifications. Its purpose is to give substance to the volumes and allow necessary adjustments to curves and radii, to give the body a curvier finish.
The physical medium allows the production of resin moulds.The six moulds needed to produce the body are then assembled and lined with epoxy resin. Used in the mass production of cars, this 3mm thick resin has mechanical properties guaranteeing excellent rigidity.
At the same time, parts such as the headlights, seats and fascia panel are also moulded.
The sidelights and headlamps use polycarbonate, while the casing relies on the technique of nylon sintering.The colour of the parts is obtained by plexiglass cut from a solid block.
The seats consist of two epoxy half-shells assembled on a steel chassis. The fascia panel is made of high-density foam, milled from a solid block.
The different body parts are then assembled. This stage is the longest, since it necessitates a high level of precision: parts are lightly reworked, certain assembly procedures are modified.
The generous glazed surface area of the Moovie is made of polycarbonate. Before being installed on the body, this thermoformed part is adjusted with meticulous attention to detail.
The paint is applied in two stages. A polyurethane primer thinned with water is applied first, allowing final corrections to be made to the body.Three different paint pigments are then applied, the final aspect being given by the varnish: brilliant for the body, soft for the interior.
The Moovie can now receive the Marque badge. The lion is made in stereo before being chromeplated.
Technical Specifications
Length: 2.33 m
Width: 1.80 m
Height: 1.54 m
Estimated weight: 500 kg
LED lighting
Conclusions
Fascinating! Father Time plans on being around for another couple of decades to see some of this futuristic stuff come to life. Oh ya!
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
A Good Friend Moves On
Now he has departed from this strange world a little ahead of me. That means nothing. People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion.
Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
Monday, June 19, 2006
Joey Watch
Remember Joey, the Shetland Sheepdog we adopted three+ weeks ago? He's turning out to be quite a find.
He's settling down, made peace with the cats, and has taken over my job driving the truck. I knew shelties were smart but this is even better than having a trunk monkey!
Right now he's teaching me how to fetch. I've got the chase part down but can't figure out what I have to do to get a food pellet. On the positive side, I've lost a few pounds from all the exercise. Being a dog's pet is turning out to be quite enjoyable!
He's settling down, made peace with the cats, and has taken over my job driving the truck. I knew shelties were smart but this is even better than having a trunk monkey!
Right now he's teaching me how to fetch. I've got the chase part down but can't figure out what I have to do to get a food pellet. On the positive side, I've lost a few pounds from all the exercise. Being a dog's pet is turning out to be quite enjoyable!
Is There A Peugeot In Your Future?
Remember Peugeots? In the 70's and 80's they were a hot item if you craved anonymity.
If you thought Peugeots were "Plain Jane" you were not doing Jane any favors. If your car was underpowered, unreliable, and had zero trade-in value, then you were driving a Peugeot.
So, while surfing the CarScoop web site, I was totally shocked to see Peugeot is not only alive and well, but facing the future with something unlike anything I have ever seen before - called the Moovie. (No kidding - that's really what they call it!) It not only is one of the most radical vehicles I have ever seen, but it raises more questions than Jeopardy - like where is the engine? Are those tires? Where is the gas tank? Does it even use gas? Does it have a dashboard with room for my GPS screen? Now THAT's really important!
As answers become available, I will share them here. I think Peugeot has to figure out some of the answers too. The CarScoop watch begins!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
A Picture Is Worth. . . . . . . ?
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Progress In Iraq
Now that our special forces have found al-Zarqawi, can Osama be far behind?
I used this picture previously on The Fly's blog, but it's too good not to repeat here. I wonder, since the Air Force found one bad guy hiding in a hut, why can't they catch Osama out in the open when he's on a beer run?
One can only hope.
I used this picture previously on The Fly's blog, but it's too good not to repeat here. I wonder, since the Air Force found one bad guy hiding in a hut, why can't they catch Osama out in the open when he's on a beer run?
One can only hope.
Sunday, June 11, 2006
Sunday Quote - Clarity Clarified
Those who write clearly have readers; those who write obscurely have commentators.
Abraham Lincoln 1809-1865
I have a lot of work to do.
Father Time 1939-??
Abraham Lincoln 1809-1865
I have a lot of work to do.
Father Time 1939-??
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Saturday Quote
He who is of a calm and happy nature will hardly feel the pressure of age, but to him who is of an opposite disposition, youth and age are equally a burden.
Plato (427-347 BC)
Plato (427-347 BC)
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Subterranean Homesick Blues
Dedicated To The Fly
A Native Oregonian Who Now Spends His Days In The Mojave Desert thinking of water.
Lyrics To Sing While Contemplating Water
with a big thanks to Bob Dylan
Johnny's in the basement
Mixing up the medicine
I'm on the pavement
Thinking about the government
The man in the trench coat
Badge out, laid off
Says he's got a bad cough
Wants to get it paid off
Look out kid
It's somethin you did
God knows when
But youre doin it again
You better duck down the alley way
Lookin for a new friend
The man in the coon-skin cap
In the big pen
Wants eleven dollar bills
You only got ten
A Native Oregonian Who Now Spends His Days In The Mojave Desert thinking of water.
Lyrics To Sing While Contemplating Water
with a big thanks to Bob Dylan
Johnny's in the basement
Mixing up the medicine
I'm on the pavement
Thinking about the government
The man in the trench coat
Badge out, laid off
Says he's got a bad cough
Wants to get it paid off
Look out kid
It's somethin you did
God knows when
But youre doin it again
You better duck down the alley way
Lookin for a new friend
The man in the coon-skin cap
In the big pen
Wants eleven dollar bills
You only got ten
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
New Symbols Of Security? UPDATED
From time to time, public relations issues arise at the most advanced levels of the our government. Agencies who employ our best and brightest sometimes encounter criticism from the public at large. This negative press is usually dealt with by indulging in intense questioning and ethics evaluations on TV with Congressional subcommittees and/or the hiring of consultants who have relatives on the agency payroll. No turn is left unstoned attempting to create order out of chaos.
One such example is the current issue being tossed around at the office of the United States Director of National Intelligence who apparently feels the need for an agency symbol that would engender a feeling of warmth and comfort for those of us who are non-intelligent people, (meaning we don't work for the government or defense contractors). UPDATE: My friend tells me it should be "non-intelligence" people rather than "non-intelligent". Opps!
The birds pictured here are finalists in the symbol competition since the eagle and turkey were already taken by other government agencies.
This symbol would send a message that all of the various intelligence agencies are now working together in perfect harmony. It would convey the idea this combine of formerly feuding fiefdoms is now one big happy well-oiled machine; that they are ever vigilant, see and share everything, on duty 24/7, and getting warrants for anything that might involve invasion of personal privacy. I've GOT to quit listening to Lewis Black routines!
Personally, I prefer the cartoon bird because it wouldn't require extra security to protect it from kidnapping attempts. Plus, it would look good on agents' badges. It just reeks of respect!
I will try to find other things that reek in future posts.
Monday, June 05, 2006
Cats Demanding Satisfaction
With the addition of a new Sheltie to the household, our resident cats have been in constant turmoil for over a week. When we caught our oldest cat, Friskie, reading a book on devil worship, we decided to honor their senior status with a special treat - allow them access to the hot tub room. With the water temp at 101 degrees, sleeping on the cover is almost as luxurious as laying on a warm beach in the Caribbean, plus they can spy on the dog in complete safety.
However, when I saw this cartoon, I began questioning my hot tub strategy. If I can find one of those old fashioned toilets someplace, it might solve a lot of problems around here!
However, when I saw this cartoon, I began questioning my hot tub strategy. If I can find one of those old fashioned toilets someplace, it might solve a lot of problems around here!
Friday, June 02, 2006
Belated Card Complete With Confession
Maybe this senior citizen memory thing has basis in fact - I totally forgot to wish everyone a Happy Spring!
I post this greeting at great peril.
Some of my male friends will think I've gone soft and squishy. Look at the flowers on Father Time's blog. Give me a break!
No doubt some female friends will question my motives. What's with the "sensitive male" junk? Who's he trying to kid?
Truth!
I just happen to like symmetrical designs. It's a weakness. When I enter a room I'm like Monk, checking out everything, making sure each wall is balanced, vases are arranged by height, and every piece of furniture is either at 90 degrees to the wall or parallel to it. Angle something and I fidget all evening long!
Granted, the flower arrangement is not perfectly symmetrical, but just like horseshoes - close enough!
Now that I have confessed I have a weakness, I feel cleansed and will return to my stong self-imposed male role. Unless I see some really cool Japanese vases! But that's for another time.
I post this greeting at great peril.
Some of my male friends will think I've gone soft and squishy. Look at the flowers on Father Time's blog. Give me a break!
No doubt some female friends will question my motives. What's with the "sensitive male" junk? Who's he trying to kid?
Truth!
I just happen to like symmetrical designs. It's a weakness. When I enter a room I'm like Monk, checking out everything, making sure each wall is balanced, vases are arranged by height, and every piece of furniture is either at 90 degrees to the wall or parallel to it. Angle something and I fidget all evening long!
Granted, the flower arrangement is not perfectly symmetrical, but just like horseshoes - close enough!
Now that I have confessed I have a weakness, I feel cleansed and will return to my stong self-imposed male role. Unless I see some really cool Japanese vases! But that's for another time.
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